Menthol Balm Test: Bound, Stimmed, and Measured

I’m your favourite toy tester and today I’m trialling a brand new stimulation balm. Now I must be fully restrained to prevent me from flinching away during sensation tests, so I start by slipping into gloves to keep the trial hygienic. A collection tube is gently inserted so we can monitor the amount of response. Once I apply the menthol balm, I nearly lose my composure. A crotch rope keeps me pinned in place as I describe every sensation. To lock the first vibrator in position, I slide on tight latex pants over the rope. Then my assistant secures my wrists to my ankles, ensuring I can’t squirm away. The balm is overwhelming at first, but combined with the toy’s pressure, it begins to mellow into something enjoyable. And then comes the final test: the strongest toy we own strapped into place at full intensity. I’m breathless and now there’s no escape. After the test, the collection tube shows a heavy response, much more than expected. I call that a very successful trial.